NATO Cafeteria Cold Open – SNL

NATO Cafeteria Cold Open – SNL

Full Video Link:


Video ID:

LBjGD5VGVg0


Audio Caption:

[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
♪♪♪ >> OH, HEY, DENMARK.
>> HEY, NORWAY. NATO CONFERENCE HAS BEEN HELLA
RAD THIS YEAR. >> TOTALLY.
LOOK. THEY'RE SO COOL.
♪♪♪ [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> BONJOUR! >> HEY, SORRY.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> OH, MY GOD, WOW.
BORIS IS HANGING OUT WITH THEM NOW, TOO.
♪♪♪ [ LAUGHTER ]
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> HA HA HAH HA RATHER!
[ LAUGHTER ] COME ON.
LET'S GET SOME LUNCH. MAYBE EVEN SOME WINE.
BECAUSE WE ARE BAD BOYS. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> ROMANIA, SCRAM! [ LAUGHTER ]
>> HEY, YOU GUYS. I LOVE YOUR ECONOMY.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> AU REVOIR, GEEK!
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, WHY DON'T YOU BREXIT
OUTTA HERE, DWEEB? [ LAUGHTER ]
>> OMG. IS THAT SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE,
BORIS? YOU'RE BEING SO CRINGE RIGHT
NOW. >> SORRY, SORRY.
>> JUST TRY ON KEEP UP, ALL RIGHT?
THAT'S WHAT IT'S LIKE TO HANG OUT WITH COOL GUYS.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ LAUGHTER ]
>> LOOK, IT'S TRUMP. BE QUIET.
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ] >> DID YOU SEE HIM SPEAK FOR
45 MINUTES THE OTHER DAY? IT WAS JUST SUPPOSED TO BE A
PHOTO. >> WELL IF I LOOKED LIKE HIM,
I'D TRY TO DISTRACT THE PHOTOGRAPHER, TOO.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, HE'S NOT GOOD LOOKING
LIKE US THREE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> OH, HEY, GUYS, IS THIS SEAT TAKEN?
>> SORRY, IT ACTUALLY IS. >> YES, WE WOULD LOVE TO SEE YOU
TALK AND CHEW AT THE SAME TIME, BUT WE PROMISED THIS TO A
FRIEND. >> WELL, I'M BORIS' FRIEND,
RIGHT, BORIS? >> DON'T MAKE THIS HARDER THAN
IT IS — [ LAUGHTER ]
>> I'M HANGING OUT WITH THESE GUYS NOW.
>> WHY DON'T YOU SIT OVER THERE, DONALD?
WITH LATVIA? >> YES.
[ LAUGHTER ] LATVIA SEEMS MORE YOUR SPEED.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> OKAY, WELL, LET'S HANG OUT
LATER ON THEN, OKAY? >> OH, DEFINITELY.
YEAH, HEY, BY THE WAY, YOU LOOK THIN.
HAVE YOU LOST WEIGHT? >> ACTUALLY I'VE GAINED QUITE A
BIT. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> WELL IT DOES NOT SHOW. YOU LOOK GOOD.
>> AND THAT TIE. WHAT IS IT MADE OF?
>> CHINESE CHEMICALS. IT IS A CLIP-ON, TOP AND BOTTOM.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> VERY COOL.
>> WELL, AU REVOIR. >> O-M-G, THAT GUY'S A MESS.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> DID YOU HEAR HIM TALK ABOUT
CLIMATE CHANGE THE OTHER DAY? HE SAID WE NEED STRONGER
TOILETS. >> HE'S LIKE DUMBER THAN BORIS.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> HE'S DUMBER THAN ME!
[ LAUGHTER ] >> QUICK, QUICK.
WAVE SO HE THINKS WE LIKE HIM. [ LAUGHTER ]
[ LAUGHTER ] >> THESE ARE MY BEST FRIENDS.
WE RUN THIS PLACE. >> OH, THAT'S NICE.
MY NAME IS EGILS LEVITS BUT YOU CAN CALL ME EGG.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO TRY SOME OF MY PICKLED OCTOPUS?
>> OH, MY GOD. I'M AT THE LOSER'S TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER ] I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY MADE ME SIT
WITH THE FOREIGN GUY. >> HEY, THIS IS NATO.
WE'RE ALL FOREIGN. >> OKAY, FRED, PLEASE, I'M
TRYING TO EAVESDROP. >> SO, BORIS, MACRON AND I WERE
TALKING. WE THINK THAT YOU SHOULD THROW A
PARTY. THIS WEEKEND.
AT BUCKINGHAM PALACE. >> WELL, THAT'S, THAT'S THE
QUEEN'S HOUSE. >> AH DO IT, BORIS!
UNLESS, YOU'RE NOT COOL ENOUGH. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> DID SOMEBODY SAY SOMETHING ABOUT A PARTY?
>> I DON'T THINK WOULD YOU WANT TO GO.
WE'D HAVE TO WALK UPSTAIRS. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> YES, AND THE FOOD IS ALL HIGH QUALITY BUT SMALL PORTIONS.
IT'S YOUR NIGHTMARE. >> YEAH.
YOU LIKE YOUNGER WOMEN. THIS PARTY'S ONLY GOT MACRON'S
WIFE. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> WHAT DID YOU SAY? >> NO, I'M JUST SAYING BECAUSE
YOUR WIFE IS OLD. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> THAT'S GOOD. I LIKE WHEN IT'S MEAN BUT NOT
ABOUT ME. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
SO, SHOULD I SIT WITH YOU GUYS? BECAUSE THIS SEAT IS STILL OPEN.
>> NO. IT'S, ACTUALLY, IT'S FOR SOMEONE
ELSE. ANGELA!
>> ANGELA! [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
WE SAVED YOU A SEAT. [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> IS THIS HAPPENING? [ LAUGHTER ]
AM I ACTUALLY ABOUT TO SIT AT THE COOL KIDS TABLE?
[ LAUGHTER ] OKAY.
JUST RELAX, ANGELA. SHOULD I BRING MY SNOOGLEHORN?
[ LAUGHTER ] NO, I MUST LEAVE THIS BEHIND.
I MUST LEAVE IT ALL BEHIND BECAUSE I AM COOL NOW.
[ LAUGHTER ] WELL MAYBE ONE STRUDEL.
HEY, SO — [ LAUGHTER ]
WHAT'S UP, MY DUDES? SORRY, DONALD, YOU SHNOOGAN, YOU
LOOGAN. [ LAUGHTER ]
HELLO FELLOW COOL KIDS. SOYBEAN TARIFFS, AM I RIGHT?
>> HEY, ANGELA, YOU KNOW WHO MIGHT BE COMING TO OUR PARTY?
OBAMA! >> BARACK!
[ LAUGHTER ] >> YES, AND DON'T YOU LIKE-LIKE
HIM? >> WHAT?
NO. OBAMA?
OBAMA IS LIKE GROSS. [ LAUGHTER ]
I DEFINITELY DID NOT DRAW HIS FACE ON MY BODY PILLOW OR
ANYTHING. [ LAUGHTER ]
>> AND DONALD, I HEARD SOMEONE LIKES YOU, TOO.
>> REALLY, WHO? >> PUTIN.
[ LAUGHTER ] >> — BORIS, DO THE SIGNS.
>> WELL, YOU KNOW, YOU BETTER GET BACK TO LATVIA, DONALD.
>> YES. [ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> OKAY, I'LL SEE YOU AT THE PARTY LATER.
>> YEAH, TOTALLY. IT'S UNDER THE LONDON BRIDGE.
BUT YOU HAVE TO SHOW UP NAKED. >> OKAY.
[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> SEE YOU GUYS THERE. >> I THINK.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] >> HEY, YOU KNOW, THOSE GUYS
AREN'T YOUR FRIENDS. THEY'RE MEAN.
>> WELL, THEY'RE JUST KIDDING AROUND.
THEY LOVE ME. >> ARE YOU CRYING?
I JUST HAVE A LITTLE CHEESEBURGER IN MY EYE.
[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]
>> YOU KNOW, YOU GUYS ARE JERKS. YOU'RE ALL TWO-FACED, AND I'M
NOT GETTING IMPEACHED. IT'S ALL A SHAM.
>> WELL, SPEAKING OF FACES, I'VE HEARD YOU CAN'T GET IMPEACHED IF
YOUR HAND IS BIGGER THAN YOUR FACE.
>> REALLY? [ SLAP ]
[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ] ♪♪♪
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]
>> BULLYING IS A SERIOUS PROBLEM.
ESPECIALLY AGAINST PRESIDENT TRUMP.
IT'S NOT NICE. HE WOULD NEVER DO TO YOU.
[ LAUGHTER ] SO PLEASE, EUROPEAN LEADERS, BE
BEST. OH, AND I'D ALSO LIKE TO TELL
YOU ABOUT PELOTON. ARE YOU SCARED —
[ LAUGHTER ] WHY NOT IMAGINE BIKING AWAY FROM
IT ALL. ON PELOTON.
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ME. OH AND —
>> LIVE FROM NEW YORK IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!


Video Description:


 

About the Author: Kik Vids

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.